Hilariously Funny WhatsApp Status | Witty WhatsApp Status

Best funny WhatsApp status in English. Now you will always comes up with something witty to update

Funny WhatsApp Status

check our some of the best Funny WhatsApp ConversationsUpdate your Funny WhatsApp status in a witty, clever, hilarious and sarcastic way with these status & quotes.

Recently we shared a collection of WhatsApp Love Status so today we will be sharing some of the coolest WhatsApp status with sarcastic response in a funny & witty manner. Witty WhatsApp status collection with the sarcastic humour that will bring the smile on your friend’s face.

Presenting you the collection of best funny WhatsApp status.

CGPA available for adoption… can’t raise it myself.

When I actually die some people are going to get really haunted.

Want to surprise your girlfriend? Introduce her to your wife.

There are 3 types of people in the world- vegetarian, non-vegetarian & Tuesday Saturday.

Early to bed and early to rise. Makes your girlfriend talk to the other guys.

Whenever i do stupid thing, dad looks to mom in a way that he is demanding refund..

SI unit of ignorance = “seen”

I love to walk in Fog, Because nobody knows i am Smoking


A fine is a tax for doing wrong. A tax is a fine for doing well

Zombies are looking for brain, don’t worry you’re safe

Dear Mario…..I Wasted My Childhood Trying To Save Your Girlfriend.Now, you help me to save mine.

Witty WhatsApp Status

Having one child makes you a parent, having two makes you a referee.

Dry fruits are just fruits that have become senior citizens.

I love my job only when I’m on vacation .

Witty WhatsApp Status

Love is like fart. If you force it, It’s probably shit.

I pretend to work. They pretend to pay me.

I am currently experiencing life at the rate of 15 WTF’s every hours

I’m not sarcastic, I am just intelligent beyond your understanding.

Looks like I over-estimated the number of your brain cells.

Don’t kiss behind the garden, Love is blind but the neighbors are not

Funny Quote

A relationship is made for two, but some bitches are bad in math.

Mirrors can’t talk, lucky for you they can’t laugh either.

When your girlfriend picks a restaurant that is very costly, you just say “Oh    yeah, that’s where the really cute girl works”.

Problem with this generation is we first search for a Lover & then fall in Love.

I am sitting here looking at the most amazing person I have ever seen,   smart, funny, caring, and absolutely stunning! Yes, I am looking in the   mirror!

I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I   hate plants.

There is a fine line between fashion and circus. So where’s the tent.

Today morning when I was driving my Ferrari, the alarm woke me up.

God must love stupid people- he made so many.

I dont believe in ghosts, but when i see you. God save me

I am brilliant brunette with lots of blonde moments

Some people just need a high five. In the face. With a chair

Dear karma, I have a list of people you missed.

8 planets, 204 countries, 809 islands, 7 seas, 600000000+ people and i am single

Forever Alone Status

Why is monday so far from friday, amd friday so near to monday? This is cheating

Beer doesnt get jealous when you Grab another Beer.

My life has become  like  subway surfers and temple run collecting coins reaching nowhere.

Last seen 1980! 😀

Never make eye contact while eating a banana.

Life is Short – Chat Fast!

If life gives you lemons, just add vodka.

How can i miss something i never had?

Funny WhatsApp Status

Girls, if he only wants your breasts, legs, and thighs. send him to KFC.

Witty Quote

You can never buy Love….But still you have to pay for it ..

My biggest concern in life is actually how my online friends can be informed of my death..!!

When I’m a Pedestrian I Hate cars.. When I’m Driving I Hate Pedestrians…

Whoever says “Good Morning” on Monday’s deserves to get slapped 🙂

Mosquitos are like family. Annoying but they carry your blood.

Who needs television when there is so much drama on Facebook.

Everything funnier when your supposed to be quiet..

I want someone to look at me the way I look at cupcakes!!

When I’m on my death bed, I want my final words to be “I left one million dollars in the…

I wake up when I cant hold my pee in any longer.

People who exercise live longer, but what’s the point when those extra years are spent at gym.

Relationship Status: Looking for a WiFi connection.

It may look like I’m deep in thought, but 99% of the time I’m just thinking about what food to eat later.

Checking your symptoms on Google and accepting that fact that you’re going to die.

Sorry about those texts I sent you last night, my phone was drunk.

We are WTF generation …. WhatsApp, Twitter and Facebook 😀

Having a best friend with the same mental disorder is a blessing. LOL

It’s been 70+ years, Tom. You’re never going to eat Jerry 🙂

I want some one to give me a Loan and then leave me Alone. 🙂

There’s like 7 billion people in this world and no one wants to date me. I hate this world … huh

I don’t usually sleep enough, but when I do, it’s still not enough 😉

The only thing I gained so far in THIS YEAR is weight 🙂

I am not addicted to WHATS APP. I only use it when I have time ……. lunch time, break time, bed time, this time, that time, any time, all the time. 🙂

Running away does not help you with your problems, unless you are fat.

GOOGLE must be a woman because it knows everything.

I have enough money to last me the rest of my life, unless I buy something.

I’ve had a horribly busy day converting oxygen into carbon dioxide.

Some people should have multiple Facebook accounts to go along with their multiple personalities.

I always learn from mistake of others who take my advice

At least mosquito’s are attracted to me.

I really need 5 hours of Facebook to balance out my 5 minutes of studying.

Restaurant Advertisement: We serve food as HOT as your neighbour’s wife; And beer as COLD as your own.

If you love someone, set them free. If they come back, nobody else wanted them either

Today’s Relationships: You can touch each other but not each others phones.

I am sure I have a defective iPhone, I keep pressing the home button and I’m still at work.

One day your prince will come. Mine just took a wrong turn, got lost and is too stubborn to ask for directions 🙂

All my life I thought air is free until I bought a bag of chips.

We hope that you enjoyed the above shared witty and funny WhatsApp Statuses. We will continue to add more funny status & quotes in future. If you have something witty in your mind, please share the humour with us. We would love to have your funny WhatsApp status on our website.

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